Dear Buddy,
Six years ago today, a red-faced, chubby-cheeked baby boy was placed in my arms, and my world was changed forever. You heard my voice and I swear you tried to turn your head as if you recognized me, and I completely melted. The love I felt was overwhelming, unconditional and pure. And it still is.
Today you are my handsome, smart and wickedly funny six-year-old boy, but I feel like we’re standing at a crossroads of sort. You started kindergarten a few weeks ago, where you disappear all day into a world I don’t really know much about with people I don’t really know. You’re content playing by yourself for hours in your playroom, building intricate Lego spaceships or acting out battles with your Star Wars action figures, and you don’t ask me to join you as much as you used to. As I keep saying, it’s like you’re starting your big boy life.
But sometimes, when we’re snuggling as we watch a movie or when you crawl into our bed on weekend mornings, I still see that tow-headed little boy who adored Barney and Elmo and Dora the Explorer. The little boy who liked to climb on top of counters and would laugh hysterically when he was tossed up into the air. The little boy with matching scars on each eyebrow. The little boy who would run and play so hard all morning that he would literally fall asleep into his peanut butter-and-jelly sandwich at lunch. The little boy with the goofy smiles who loved (and still does!) to perform; how many times have I had someone come up to me and proclaim, “He’s going to be an actor!”
I remember the little boy who would tell me, “I will love you all the years!” and blow me kisses and wrap his arms around himself to give me a pretend hug when I dropped him off at daycare each morning.
The little boy who is still attached to the blue “Papi” bear he received as a newborn and who sleeps in his bed surrounded by a dozen books, not even stirring when one or two fall off the bed with a loud clunk in the middle of the night.
I watch now, with amazement and wonder, at this big boy sprinting down the soccer field with a look of determination and focus that I’ve never seen before. I watch you sounding out words, your face lighting up when you realize you are reading. I watch you with your little sister; even though she’s small and it’s hard to relate to her, I see how you are instinctively protective (and proud) of her as a big brother should be.
I’m secretly impressed with your inquisitiveness, your curiosity and the difficult questions you ask as you try to figure out the complicated world around you. I’m still in awe that we can have real conversations now, you and I. And I can’t help but swell up with pride as I watch you converse easily with strangers (with much more confidence than I ever had at your age) and how you always say “Hello” to whoever crosses our path, whether it’s an elderly neighbor or a boy from school.
You didn’t earn the nickname “Mr. Mayor” for nothing.
This is going to be an exciting and wonderful year for you, full of new experiences, new friends and new knowledge. I am so proud of the boy you’ve become and all that you’ve accomplished so far.
But to me you’ll always be the sweet little baby who stole my heart forever one afternoon six years ago.
Happy birthday, my little buddy 🙂
Love, Mommy
Dad/Papa says
That was beautiful Jess!!! Happy Birthday Colin, love you Papa.