D and I met in college and have been friends for nearly 20 years, which is so crazy to think about. It really seems like yesterday. She was the super cool sophomore (in the single room, lucky girl!) living on a floor of nervous, anxious freshmen – including me. For some reason, she took me under her wing, and to this day she’s been like a big sister and a best friend all rolled into one.
When I ask her opinion, I know she’ll always tell me the truth – even if it’s painful to hear. When I need a shoulder to cry on, she’s always there. When I want to celebrate good news, she’s the first one to call to say “congratulations” or give me a hug. When I moved to New York City after graduation for my first “real” job and had no idea where I was going to live, she opened up her tiny Brooklyn apartment to me, letting me crash on the couch for months until I found a place. I still have so many funny memories of the two of us living in that sketchy Brooklyn neighborhood, drinking gin and tonics on the fire escape in the summer, shopping at Century 21 and avoiding the cockroaches that always seemed to invade the apartment, no matter how spotless we were.
We have a lot in common. We’re both writers. We’re both vegetarians. We both love fashion and veggie sushi and animals (although she’s a cat person, but I’ll let that slide). But unlike me, she’s always had this incredible strength and conviction and ambition. She knows what she wants, and she goes out and gets it. Not to sound completely sappy, but I have always respected and admired her.
Oh, and did I mention she is the reason I met my husband? Remember this story? Yup, that was her.
D and I always seem to end up in the same city together. We were both in New York. She moved back to Boston and I ended up moving there a year later. Fast forward about 3 or 4 years, and Dr. G. and I packed up for Baltimore for grad school. A year later, D and A moved to Washington, D.C. – only an hour away. In 2007, we ended up back in the Boston area, and so did they.
But opportunities led them back to D.C. in the fall of 2011, and to say “I miss her” would be an understatement. I flew down for a girls weekend last summer, but I haven’t seen her since, which I think is the longest we’ve gone without seeing each other in two decades. I miss being able to meet up with her on the weekends, when I’d drive into Boston and we’d go out for lunch and get a cheapie manicure. It’s hard relying on the phone to catch up, because we have completely different schedules and routines. We often have to ‘schedule’ our phone chats, which feels so forced and planned but at least ensures we’ll be able to talk, which is all that matters. But it’s not the same.
So that’s why I am so excited that she’s coming to visit this weekend. We don’t have much on our agenda besides spending Saturday in the city, grabbing lunch, doing a little shopping and treating ourselves to fancy afternoon tea at one of the swanky Boston hotels. But honestly, I’m just looking forward to sitting around and talking to her, whether it’s over coffee at my kitchen table or over a bottle of wine curled up on the couch. And I can’t wait to see her with my kiddos – especially Mimi, who she hasn’t seen since she was an infant.
I am so incredibly fortunate and lucky to have friends like D in my life. It’s like the old saying goes: Friends are the family we choose for ourselves. And as I sit here and count down the hours until her flight arrives, I can’t help but think what a family that is.
Sheri says
Yes, I agree, friends are the family we choose. Have fun!!
Leah DeCesare says
Have a fun weekend together! I was supposed to go visit one of my dearest friends in NY this weekend, too (her initial is also “D” – for Dana) but I’m auditioning for Listen to Your Mother so need to be here.
I think of the words from the Pearl Jam song “Just Breathe” –
“I’m a lucky man, to count on both hands the ones I love. Some folks just have one, yeah, others they got none…”
Chelley / AisForAdelaide says
This post made me tear up. I love my bestie, although we met more recently, and I fear the day we move (which is bound to happen, whenever we can sell the house).
Enjoy your weekend together- I can’t wait to hear what things you come up with!
Sharon - MomGenerations.com says
This post is so beautiful, I’m smiling while sitting here in my home all by myself! I have a dear college friend with whom I lost touch for quite some time and then reconnected with on Facebook! We both just hit 60 and still have so much in common, and even our differences have merged. I’m a late-to-it runner and C just began running last year. It’s like a little miracle to us. Another dear friend and I met while both teaching, 2 pregnant ladies, 36 years ago! We retired together, now each have grandkids, and try to meet every few weeks for sometimes 4-hour breakfasts at our favorite restaurant joint on the East Side of Providence. I feel your love, your friendship, your combined hearts and wish you the most magnificent weekend ever…
Jane - MomGenerations.com says
Friendships like this are few and far between. You’re both so lucky to have each other in your lives!! Have an amazing weekend!
Stephanie Kay says
Old college friends are the best! They remember who you were BEFORE husbands and kids and {whispers} gray hairs. I haven’t seen my friends is several years. You’ve reminded me it’s time for a reunion!