Yesterday, I did something I don’t think I’ve ever done: gone on a relatively long road trip by myself. As in, no carsick kids. No one asking me “how much longer” or demanding snacks and juice boxes and tissues.
Why the road adventure, you ask? A very special baby shower. My friend M, who I’ve known for nearly 16 years (if my math is correct, and that’s never a good assumption), and her wife, C, are expecting a little girl in March! They live in Virginia, so I don’t get to see them very often, which is why I was thrilled when I learned their baby shower would be right outside of New York City in Hackensack, New Jersey. Not only could I celebrate with one of my dearest friends, but it was also going to be a mini-college reunion: all the our other friends from the area were going to be there, too. There was no way I was missing that.
I got dressed and jumped in the car by 7:45am, grabbed a large coffee and turned on the Tina Fey Bossypants audiobook I’d checked out of the library the day before. I’d been dying to read the actual book, yet never had the time, but hearing Tina read it was almost better in a way. I laughed the four hours from Massachusetts to New Jersey, openly enjoying the R-rated, non-kid-friendly humor without trying to spin a response when Buddy would surely ask me, “Mommy, what’s a [fill in the blank]?”
I cruised into New Jersey a little before noon. The shower location, Stony Hill Inn, was gorgeous. Very rustic and charming. But I wasn’t here for the locale and atmosphere. I was here for these lovely ladies.
And to see these gals.
I love baby showers, though when I see all that gear, there are usually two thoughts that go through my mind: Thank God we don’t need all that crap anymore! and Wow, the stuff they have is soooo much nicer than what was available six years ago when Buddy was born!
The decorations were gorgeous …
… and don’t get me started on the food. Delicious.
After the long drive, this definitely came in handy.
Loved the shower games (and I’m not just saying it because I totally killed them; yes, I’m bragging). Thanks to Miss Mimi and her many, many books about baby animals, I won the game in which we had to list what the baby of certain animals are called (e.g. dog –>; puppy).
I’m still impressed/disturbed that I remembered a baby swan is a cygnet, yet I can’t remember to pack Buddy’s snack or I forget to bring him to the bus stop in the morning (more about that some other time). But thanks to my useless knowledge of baby animals, I won a beautiful picture frame that will go perfect in my office.
We each wrote a note to the happy parents to offer our “words of advice.” We giggled around our table (since we are all moms) about whether we should be brutally honest. Do we talk about how your body will never be the same, or how “sleep when the baby sleeps” is a load of crap? Do we suggest they get used to not showering now? Do we recommend they buy in bulk from Starbucks? Or do we share how incredible and terrifying and overwhelming and fulfilling it is to be someone’s mom?
In the end I decided to include a little bit of both.
I wish someone had told me, back in the day, that it’s true: no one is “keeping score.” You just need to do what is right for you, for your baby and for your family, and all will be well. Don’t let others tell you whether something is right or wrong, or make you feel bad if your baby isn’t sleeping through the night or rolling over by a certain age. Say it with me: no two babies are alike! The fact that there are still some people who think otherwise, and insinuate that all babies live on the same schedule and should hit certain milestones at the exact same time and if they don’t then something is wrong, is truly mind-boggling.
It was a beautiful and special day, and I was honored to be a part of it. This will be one very lucky girl to be welcomed soon by two parents – not to mention countless family members and friends – who want and love her so much.
Thankfully, the drive back was uneventful and I was back with Dr. G. and the kiddos in time to watch the last few minutes of “Madagascar” before crashing. A successful day, in my book.
Have you ever done a long-ish road trip by yourself? How did did pass the time? I’m kind of digging audiobooks right now. I have one more (J. Courtney Sullivan’s Maine) that I didn’t get to start, so I think I’m going to try listening to it during my commute this week.